Pain in the @#$% !

Well this second clinical trial treatment is certaining hitting me harder than the first or any other previous treatment really. Hopefully that is a sign that things are working and making a difference! I am tired, irritable and can't seem to get comfortable for any length of time. I am napping more than usual and just don't seem to have the same level of energy that I used to have. 

It has crossed my mind, that this may not be the new treatment at all that is causing this discomfort and irritability, but is an evolution and the progression of my symptoms with time. On the other hand, or glass half full perspective -  perhaps my new treatment is working and is fighting my cancer on the inside and this pain is the price to pay on the battlefield. I am hoping that it is the latter of course and all this discomfort will be worth it -- that it is making a difference and is actually shrinking my tumors. 

One of issues I am having this  this time around is back pain (and well something else we don't often talk about, constipation).  Dealing with the first issue - I don't know about you but next to ear aches, I find back pain  most frustrating as you can't really solve the issue. You can subdue it for awhile but it always seems to come back. It is not debilitating pain (at the moment at least) but a constant annoying pain that increases and decreases in intensity throughout the day (or the night for that matter). It is the type of pain that doesn't let you get very comfortable either sitting or lying down. The problem with taking pills to help with the pain, is other complications start to occur.  For example, one of the side effects of the codeine is it can cause - yes I am saying it in a blog - constipation. They sure do!  This is also a potential side effect of my immunotherapy medications. A double whammy. Yippee! Which brings us to my second symptom, a real pain in the @#$%! It seems that to try to solve one problem, you create another one!  Not really a great topic of discussion really but I promised to be honest in my blog and wanted to share some of the negative sides to having cancer, beyond the cancer itself.  I have never been the type of person to take numerous medications for my ailments, but my list of daily pills and supplementary pills is beginning to grow.

I am back to taking some meal replacement drinks to supplement my calorie intake. Despite being stubborn, reluctant and holding off for a long as I could, I had to admit defeat and return to using them to help provide me with my daily nutritional needs. This brings back memories of the beginning of my cancer journey when they were my primary source of nutrition. I hoped to not return there if possible.  

Overall I should not be complaining as I am sure that there are many other cancer patients out there that have it much worse than me in terms of side effects and pain and wish this was all the side effects that they had. I shouldn't complain really, in fact I need to come to the realization that it may get much worse as time goes on. We shall see. For right now while there is pain it seems bearable and manageable and I can live with this level of discomfort. 

100 Blogs!

Next week is a special week for My Personal Cancer Journey blog as we celebrate 100 blog posts. I can't really believe we have reached this milestone and I never expected to still be here writing this weekly blog for this long. An amazing milestone for sure.  Be sure to check out next week special blog post.

In the meantime, as the saying goes:  "no pain, no gain" right? Let's hope so. 

Richard