Our Photographer

This week's blog is courtesy of My Michelle .

Our home is filled with photographs.  Some are framed and covering most of the available table tops and walls.  Some are in boxes and stored on shelves, in drawers and under dressers.  Lots are on hard drives and stored electronically.  Many are school age photos of our kids, the trusty photo shoots from Sears, proud memories of proms and graduations (our own and our kids), birthdays, anniversaries and family holiday times together. Images that chronicle important events and candid moments in our lives together.

And then you come up the stairs and turn the corner and you see a collection of a different kind, a gallery sampling of some fine quality photography - mainly wildlife, flowers and birds, taken by Richard.   His other personal favourite images to post are "food", and he has been known for posting on facebook some of the more grand Sunday roast dinners and various baking challenges we've might have gotten up to over the years - and there were many!  He actively posts his images on various social and photo club platforms, some have over 30,000 views. Many are very, very good.  I've encouraged him to sell some of the images, but he is reluctant to do so, and I always wondered why.

I myself am not much of a photographer- I'll take a selfie now and again, capture a moment on my phone of something that takes my eye, but generally that job has fallen to Richard to capture the special family moments and memories.  A role not limited only for our immediate family, but our extended family as well.  We  often tease him, our personal papparazzi, as he was always snapping photos, taking so many, to get that perfect one!  But as life goes, and with so much having changed, people who have left us, looking back through all of the images, we are all so glad we have them, and importantly, that he took them.  

Now the challenge with always being the photographer, is you are behind the camera and not as often in front of the camera. So as much as you are a part of the event, with the eye of an artist,  knowing the people so well, and in that quest to capture the perfect moment, he's not always in the photograph! Richard invested in a tripod with a remote control so in recent times, we were able to get all of us in a number of shots, or we would take turns taking the snaps.

I have always been a little cavalier about photos, happy to have them after they are done, glad I bought all of those Sears portfolios of the kids (I was always a sucker to buy the whole thing!), grateful to have them all and the meaning of life they truly represent.   I've never been a person to create reams of photo albums, or scrapbooks, was always too busy or had other things to do.  As organized and a planner as Richard is, surprisingly he didn't push for this either.  But now we plan to go through those boxes and get things in order, print off some of our favourites that currently exist in the digital world, and give some away to others who may enjoy them and take comfort in "remembering when"

Now I get it, especially as you face how fleeting and fragile life can be, the value of capturing those photos. I am so glad he did.  I also get why he doesn't want to sell some of his more artistic ones.   They are a part of him, the things he saw that had some beauty or interest to him personally, something that spoke to him.

Keeping his love in our photographs, my photographer.  

             

Richard's Flickr Photo Gallery

Love, Michelle

Celebrating Fathers

Sunday is Father's Day. My children ask me every year, what I would like for a Father's Day gift. My usual response is "nothing" because I really have everything that I need or want. But this year is a little bit different, because what I really want is more time! I want more time to see them continue to mature into adulthood and beyond. I would like to be there to see them find a life partner, to hopefully have children of their own, and build on their career paths. They each have so much potential and unique talents. I know that they have exciting futures ahead of them. I really want to be apart of these milestone moments. I hope that cancer doesn't take all of them away from me and I can share in some still to come.

From the moment each of them came into Michelle and my lives, they changed our outlook and focus in life forever. As parents and as a father, you learn as you go. I am sure that we/I have made our fair share of mistakes along the way but based on the wonderful young adults that they have become, we couldn't have done that bad of a job raising them. We always tease Jonathan, that he taught us everything we needed to know about being a parent, and Josh and Sophie reaped the benefits! I hope that the many wonderful childhood memories that I hold dear in my heart are memories that they too will never forget. 

I have been so fortunate to be with all three of them for the entire summer each year. This is one of the blessings of having a career in teaching. This has meant that I have been able to be 'present' for them on weekends, holidays and all summer long. This is a special gift of time that I have been given. I can remember packing them all up in the wagon and making our way to the park each day. I can remember spreading the garden hose out on the lawn so that they could run through it on a hot day. Listening to them laugh and giggle and try to spray each other with the hose. Taking trips to the public library and signing out books for summer reading. Visiting the local wading pools to cool down prior to getting our own pool. Stopping for ice cream or a small box of Timbits during our travels. Going on day camp trips to various parks, zoos and outings. Watching them jump on the trampoline trying to do flips, playing a fierce game of badminton or croquet in the backyard. Licking popsicles on a humid day, watching them learn to do dives and grading their hand stands in the pool competitions, roasting marshmallows by the fire, making homemade pizzas on the bbq and sitting by the poolside fire at the end of a great day of swimming. "Dad, dad, dad - watch me!" And who can forget Soccerfest which always seem to land on Father's Day each year. These are just a few of our wonderful summer memories.

I can honestly say that being a father has been my greatest achievement in life. I am so fortunate to have three exceptional children (proud dad moment here). I am so very proud of the amazing adults they have become. Each of them have strong morals, determination and a kind heart. They have so much potential. Having the privilege to parent alongside Michelle, (who is an outstanding, dedicated mother) has been incredible. I could not have asked for a better life partner. We are not expert parents by any means, but we continue to dedicate our lives to guiding them and providing them with opportunities to succeed in life. We have really put a focus on them throughout our lives. We would not want it any other way.

I want to wish all fathers and father figures out there a Happy Father's Day. Well Done! 

"Of all the titles that I have been privileged to have, "Dad" has always been the best." ~ Ken Norton

Love you always Jon, Josh and Sophie!

Dad XOXO

My Michelle

The most important person in my life, my Michelle.

I'm sure that she will try to persuade me not to publish this post but I must publish it for all to read. It is important for me to share how much it means to me to have her in my life, to have her always by my side and how much I love her.  Michelle has been there for me for all the important milestone in my life. We live our lives together, taking each step in the journey as one. I could not have asked for a better partner during this new uncharted path that we are on together.

I honestly do not know how I could navigate this journey without her help.  Without her being apart of every step of this cancer journey. We are life partners and have stood beside each other for thirty-three years now. She is my soul mate.

Personal Champion

Michelle has quietly been supporting me and our family throughout this whole ordeal. She tries to remain positive and optimistic at all times. She always has a way of bringing us back to our focus which is our family.  I wonder if she truly understands the important role that she plays. She is the glue that binds us. She is the mediator, the encourager, the advocate and the champion of our family.

Michelle has been heavily researching my cancer diagnosis, trying to find new treatment options and advocating to doctors and nurses on my behalf. She supports me during appointments and keeps me focused on moving forward.

I know that she has not been sleeping well these past few months. The mental burden and impact of this disease is real.

Michelle is constantly checking in on me to see if I need anything or if there is something I would like her to do (or stop doing). She goes along with our 'dancing in the kitchen', local bucket list adventures and even goes to bed early (before 9 p.m.) on those days when I am tired without question.

Behind the scenes she is quietly disinfecting our home to ensure that there is less chance of me getting sick. Regularly cleaning sheets, surfaces and items in our home. She is trying to continue with some normalcy in our daily lives, balancing home and career. This is not an easy thing to do. I admire her ability to manage and persevere in a positive way.

When I need a pep talk, Michelle is there. When I need someone to reset my thinking back to the positive, Michelle is there. When I start to move back down into a place of self-pity, Michelle is there.

I worry about her and my children. They too are stuck in neutral. They are putting on a brave face for me but I know deep down that they are worried and concerned for our future. I am too. Unfortunately this is a ride that we must all take with its ups and its downs.

She brings a new meaning too, in sickness and in health. Michelle has been there for me and continues to be there for me, every step of the way.  I am so blessed to have her in my life.

I love you Michelle. XOXO

Richard