1st.... 2nd.....3rd.....

Well I had my 1st Port-a-Cath installed on Monday this week. I  have been hoping for some time now to have my PICC line removed as it is quite annoying. I also got rashes and itchiness due to a reaction to the dressing used to cover it, nothing seemed to really help it. Having a port-a-cath will also provide me with so much  more independence. With the PICC line I couldn't have a full bath and even had to have Michelle help me to cover it when showering.  It will also mean that I will be able to go swimming too! Our pool opening is set for early May so I will be ready to go by them. For those of you wondering, a port-a-cath is an implanted device which allows for easy access to the veins:  for taking blood samples, giving intravenous fluids and medications. Although I wish that I didn't need either, I am happy that this option was made available to me. This procedure provided short term pain for long term gain!

This week also means my 2nd biopsy in as many months. You might recall that I recently had a biopsy done. Newer samples are now needed for the study that I am on. Although a fairly non invasive procedure, it still means going under sedation and can have some complications. 

For the record, I have been in three different Toronto hospitals all in one week! Toronto Western on Monday, Princess Margaret on Thursday and Toronto General on Friday. Amazing really. We are so fortunate and lucky to have a world class medical system right here in Ontario. That is why I am supporting both Southlake Hospital through Richard's Roadrunners Virtual Challenge and have supported Princess Margaret Hospital through the purchase of a few of their Home lottery tickets. Who knows, I may be the lucky winner of both excellent care and treatment as well as a win a new home, car or cottage!

Well believe it or not this week already marks my 3rd week of treatment in the new trial. So far so good!  I had to spend another overnight stay in the hospital this week and will hopefully only need to do that one more time. I am pleased to say that I seem to be tolerating the treatment quite well with no immediate side effects to report. Another CT scan is now booked for the end of April. This is already starting to create some SCANxiety.

1st...2nd...3rd, sometimes it feels like it's three steps forward, and two steps back, but I hope through this journey, that I will at least be a step ahead of where I used to be. 

Richard

My Michelle

The most important person in my life, my Michelle.

I'm sure that she will try to persuade me not to publish this post but I must publish it for all to read. It is important for me to share how much it means to me to have her in my life, to have her always by my side and how much I love her.  Michelle has been there for me for all the important milestone in my life. We live our lives together, taking each step in the journey as one. I could not have asked for a better partner during this new uncharted path that we are on together.

I honestly do not know how I could navigate this journey without her help.  Without her being apart of every step of this cancer journey. We are life partners and have stood beside each other for thirty-three years now. She is my soul mate.

Personal Champion

Michelle has quietly been supporting me and our family throughout this whole ordeal. She tries to remain positive and optimistic at all times. She always has a way of bringing us back to our focus which is our family.  I wonder if she truly understands the important role that she plays. She is the glue that binds us. She is the mediator, the encourager, the advocate and the champion of our family.

Michelle has been heavily researching my cancer diagnosis, trying to find new treatment options and advocating to doctors and nurses on my behalf. She supports me during appointments and keeps me focused on moving forward.

I know that she has not been sleeping well these past few months. The mental burden and impact of this disease is real.

Michelle is constantly checking in on me to see if I need anything or if there is something I would like her to do (or stop doing). She goes along with our 'dancing in the kitchen', local bucket list adventures and even goes to bed early (before 9 p.m.) on those days when I am tired without question.

Behind the scenes she is quietly disinfecting our home to ensure that there is less chance of me getting sick. Regularly cleaning sheets, surfaces and items in our home. She is trying to continue with some normalcy in our daily lives, balancing home and career. This is not an easy thing to do. I admire her ability to manage and persevere in a positive way.

When I need a pep talk, Michelle is there. When I need someone to reset my thinking back to the positive, Michelle is there. When I start to move back down into a place of self-pity, Michelle is there.

I worry about her and my children. They too are stuck in neutral. They are putting on a brave face for me but I know deep down that they are worried and concerned for our future. I am too. Unfortunately this is a ride that we must all take with its ups and its downs.

She brings a new meaning too, in sickness and in health. Michelle has been there for me and continues to be there for me, every step of the way.  I am so blessed to have her in my life.

I love you Michelle. XOXO

Richard