Friday, October 23, 2020

Waiting!

Waiting is hard for all of us. We spend a great deal of our lives waiting. Waiting in line, waiting for others, waiting for important dates and events to come up. Sometimes the anticipation of waiting is exciting and even an adrenaline rush, however when you are a person with cancer and waiting for test results and next steps in your cancer journey, it is not like that at all. It is worrisome and draining. 


As I wrote in my previous post, Hurry Up and Wait, waiting is just a part of life as a cancer patient. You need to build patience. As a generally 'hyper' person, this is something hard for me to do but I have, over the past year, become better at waiting. 

There is nothing that I can really do to change it. This is my current state of affairs. I am currently anxiously waiting for the doctors to review my tests and procedure results and then get back to me with next steps. 

The problem with waiting when you have terminal cancer is that you have a finite amount of "wait" time available! Each day you wait is one more day for the cancer to grow. I have been off chemo now for a full month. My worry is that my tumours will start to grow again or are already growing! I need to get back on treatment as soon as possible. Time is a precious and a limited commodity for me and my family.  Time is of the essence!

Our hope is that the results will be favourable and I will be a good candidate for the trial so we can get started on it A.S.A.P.  If I am not a good candidate, I will them return to my oncologist at Southlake and see what other options are available to me. Doing nothing is not an option for me.

But for now, I'm still waiting, .....for just a little longer.

Postscript

I really enjoy reading the comments that people leave on my blog. They tell me that others are connecting with the topics and relating in some way to my content. It always puts a smile on my face to read them. This past week I received a comment on one of my blog posts entitled Here we go again!, that I have to acknowledge. It was from a former student of mine (who is now in his mid to late thirties I would guess). He was one of my students way back during my first few years of teaching. It was definitely a welcome surprise and so touched me that he would take the time to read my blog and comment about what a difference I had made in his life. Wow! Just wow.   

This reminds me that we need to take the time to let others know what a difference they have made in our lives. These small gestures, take just a few minutes, but can make the world of difference for the person receiving them. 

Consider taking a few minutes and let someone know how they made a difference in your life today! You will not regret it.

Richard

4 comments:

  1. I’m grateful for your posts Richard. You are absolutely right that patience is hard to practice when the information is so important for your next step. The uncertainty must be very trying. I appreciate all of the posts you share of the lovely walks, family photos and of course Lily! You are choosing to spend your time nurturing love and joy. Thank you for all of your posts and the reminder to express gratitude to those we love. Theresa

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  2. The last two post hit home for me.....I remember the horrible hurry up and wait stages of testing, treatments and side effects - I don't miss them. Your dog story sounds eerily familiar "why would we get a dog RIGHT NOW?" With so much uncertainty until the first time the dog sleeps on you and your mindset changes to "why didn't we do this sooner?"

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    1. So true! We don't know what we would do without her. She has provided so much love to our family. Thanks for commenting!

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